Arun’s parents were absolutely determined that he should go to Oxford University, where Arun's father had been. This pressure was all-encompassing for Arun and it had affected all his school life to the extent that he felt totally overwhelmed by his parents’ expectations. 

His parents were so worried that he would not pass his entrance exams that I was employed as a tutor for three months during Arun’s summer holidays to ensure that he did pass. 

What I found when I arrived in Bombay was a psychological wreck – he was so fearful of letting his parents down that he was a complete mess. Luckily Arun took to me immediately and we became great friends; we went to movies together and generally had a good time to start with – anything to take Arun’s mind off his impending Oxford entrance exams. 

I began by stressing that there were other goals in life other than getting into Oxford – there were other universities, other ways on getting on in life, other objectives, other means than Oxford. Slowly Arun started to relax and have fun in life; he ceased to be a narrow-minded swat. We started playing squash, at which he progressed very quickly; we started going for runs; anything to take his mind off studying. He relaxed and became a much more balanced, confident individual. His parents thought that I was a very bad influence; they thought that I should be getting him to study all day. 

After a few weeks Arun had become a totally different character – far more self-assured and confident. So much so that when we really started getting into his studies, he was more receptive, attentive and generally more relaxed about it all; finally his parents could see the radical change in him and were delighted. 

Needless to say, Arun easily got into the college at Oxford that was his parents’ dream and he is now doing very well there – and he is also on his college’s boat team. He is a resilient, well-rounded individual and loving Oxford – and getting so much more from it than he would have done had he not changed his character substantially during the summer holidays that I spent with him. LN